We live in a dangerous world, rife with child molesters, lunatics, and gunmen ready to fire. There are slobbering, murderous wretches lurking around every corner, and kidnappers lie in wait for the woeful children who travel without the protection of an armored S.U.V. At least, this is the hook that the fear-mongering media has baited—and many mothers believe it.

Countless parents are convinced that they must adopt this paranoid, pessimistic outlook to keep their kids safe from harm. Some are so assured of it, they’re arguing that New Yorker Lenore Skenazy should face child-abuse charges for allowing her 9-year-old son to take the subway by himself. (Video after the jump.)

Since when does a kid taking the subway make the news? Since Skenazy, a columnist for the New York Sun, left her born-and-bred New Yorker child (read: precocious, street smart), Izzy, with $20, change for call on a payphone, a subway map, and a Metrocard. Izzy had been begging Skenazy to let him take the subway alone, and she finally caved. When Skenazy wrote about the episode in her column, parents nationwide decried her actions as abuse.

What the masses see as irresponsible parenting, I see as a natural progression in the relationship between child and parent (and, of course, a hurrah in favor of public transportation). Skenazy had to let go. She had to trust her son, after giving him the tools to get himself home (a trip he’s probably made millions of times before). In my mind, Skenazy would be less of a parent had she stifled her son by trying to shelter him. (If she doesn’t reel him a little freedom now, he’ll still be suckling at mom’s proverbial teat well into his teens.)

I’ve taken millions of trips on the New York City subway and would argue that riding the train—full of people (most of them regular folk, not freaks) during daylight hours—is safer than walking home from school in a small town (as I did, from the time I was in second grade). I’d rather encourage my child to take public transit (safe, in most large cities), walk, bike, or skateboard than put him under constant surveillance, and urge him to grow fat and paranoid due to my own disproportionate fear. Are there sketchy strangers out there? Absolutely. But the likelihood that they’re going to abduct your child is nil to zip. More likely, someone you know—your dog walker, your ex-husband, your postman—is the sketchy sonofabitch who’s offering little kiddo dangerous candy. On a subway train full of New Yorkers, someone so brazen would be seen—and sucker-punched.

Source: The Today Show.

Comments (5)

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Galls said:

He took Lexington, that is fine, now if she let him out of the boroughs...

May 01, 2008

Galls said:

I meant out of Manhattan, south of 96th, not boroughs.

May 01, 2008

Bob said:

Can you expand on that comment for those of us not familiar with NY?

May 02, 2008

MarkR said:

I'd think 9 is a good age to start teaching that type of self reliance. I was about 8 or 9 when I was first allowed to ride my bike by myself to the community swimming pool about 2 miles from my house. I had to cross and ride on the shoulder of a 5 lane highway for about a qtr mile. It was a great day for independence. Mom, followed me in the car the first day, to make sure I acted in a safe manner and knew the way. But from that day on I was on my own. I have 4 & 5 y.o. boys and over the past month when we go on bike rides, they lead. I let them do this because I want to make sure they know how to get back home one day when we decide to let them go on their own. I also want to make sure they stop at stop signs and street crossing without me telling them too. And I'd agree I'm sure its safer during the day on a crowded subway car for a 9 y.o. than in a small town where its easy for a child to be independent and unseen because it's not as densely populated. Another thing I hate that you mentioned is the media and the fear mongering they cause with the "if it bleeds it leads" mentality. The first 15 min. of a news cast is constant bombardments of the "evils" of this world And this is exactly why we don't watch local news anymore and rarely watch CNN, MSNBC, or Fox for other than political news. But at the same time I've had the cops come to the door asking If we've seen so and so predator in the neighborhood, and its not like I live in the "hood" or anything like that. So I do understand the concerns.

May 02, 2008

Kate said:

Bob, Galls is referring to the Lexington (6) subway line (which is no doubt one of the safest). The subway trains run through all five of the boroughs of NYC, inc. Manhattan (of course, the hub). Outside of Manhattan, in other boroughs (esp. parts of the Bronx and Brooklyn,) some subway lines, in certain areas, can get dicey. Riding the subway in Manhattan, however, is usually pretty safe, especially during the day, and especially on the Lex.

May 02, 2008 | url

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